We're home.

Day 6

Jordan is much better. He is having some fruit loops for breakfast and will hopefully get the epidural out tonight. That hopefully means we will be going home soon.

Day 5

We were hoping to be leaving today or tomorrow, but recovery has been slow. A lot of nausea and pain issues. But, things are starting to move along. Jordan really doesn't want to be here and I hate seeing him so despondent. It seems that every hallway, room, and corner of this hospital holds a difficult memory and we are ready to get home too.

Jordan's highlight today was picking out some presents for his friends at the gift shop. It made him a little brighter to be thinking of someone else, and I am anxious for his sweet little spirit to return.

Day 3

Jordan is doing ok. It was a big surgery and takes awhile to bounce back. He has been watching Monsters Inc. and drinking blue gatorade, his favorite. We have seen lots of our old friends and they are so happy to see Jordan. We are very hopeful that this surgery will take care of a lot of the issues he's had for the past year. Very glad to be in our own room.

Surgery

The surgery is over and everything went really well. Jordan is awake and eating popsicles. Thank you all for your prayers.

Scans

Jordan had scans on Monday and they were clear! This is a milestone as now we go 6 months before the next scans. He also had a surgical procedure to repair some scarring. We will have to wait a while to see if this was successful. He has been so healthy this year, it has been great. It is difficult to return to the hospital scene, but it went well and we are hoping to avoid a bigger surgery if this one was successful.

Clear scans today!
Jordan also gone 1 year without staying in the hospital, 6 months without an infection and 2 months with no fevers. We are very thankful.

Good Scans

The scans were clear today. Thanks for your prayers.

Scans

I have chosen to stay away from this blog for awhile. Sometimes it is a very hard place to visit. We have had a good year, though. Jordan's health has fluctuated, but for the most part he has been able to be a normal little boy and he enjoys life to the fullest when he can. We are so thankful for him and the joy he brings to our lives. I would very much like to forget all that has happened and just go on with life, and I have been desperately trying to escape the cancer world, but have found it impossible. It will be forever part of who we are. The memories of the last few years trouble me greatly and when scans are on the horizon they are haunting. Jordan goes in for his routine scans on July 1st. Please pray for good results. I'll try and update some pictures soon.

Clear scans

Clear scans today. Thanks for your prayers.

Scans

Jordan has his routine scans tomorrow. We appreciate your prayers.

Kyle

For those of you have been reading this blog for a long time, you may remember Kyle. He was a little boy who was going through radiation at the same time as Jordan. He died this past Saturday. Kyle was an amazing little boy who made a huge impression on Brent, my sister Julie (who came to radiation with us), and I. He made the most of every moment. When he had to wear an eye patch because of the way the tumor affected his eyes, he came in a pirate costume to match. Since he had to navigate the hard, windy halls of UW hospital everyday, he wore his Heelies, so he could whip around the corners. And on the weekends, when most kids would be exhausted and sick, he tore down the mountain on his skis and scored the most goals on his soccer team. He inspired me each day we were there, and was the only thing I missed when radiation was over. I have also thought of his mom a lot since that time, as she came in each day with a smile acting as if they were coming to some social get together. I knew she was crying inside, but Kyle didn't. She is one of the bravest people I've met since this whole thing began. We were blessed to have known Kyle and grieve with his family in their loss of such an incredible little boy.

The Cancer Club

Yesterday was Jenna's memorial. Chris and Michele, her parents, did an amazing job of honoring their daughter's life. I listened to stories of events from her life and wished I could have been there. Jenna will be missed so much.

Sitting in the service I looked around and saw many familiar faces. They were at all corners of the church. The cancer club, I call it. Parents who have lost a child and the others of us who fear it everyday. They came in their deepest pain, from far away, and some were there who didn't even know them very well, but were there to support Chris and Michele.

Everyday, I wish I could escape this club of fear and watching those I care about suffer, but yesterday I felt honored to be a part of the group. They are a group of inspirational parents who have sacrificed everything for their children, who have reached deep for strength to endure each day, and who have demonstrated amazing love in their darkest times. For their children, and for each other. We have been bonded together in the most horrific of circumstances, but I am a better person because I know them.

Jenna

Thursday, sweet little Jenna went to Heaven. Jenna was an extraordinary, beautiful, joyful little girl. She was able to make everyone she knew feel special and was a very good friend to Jordan, bringing him comfort when no one else could. We are so glad she has a new body and no more tears or suffering, but we are heartbroken with her family. We will miss you Jenna. Till we meet again.

Cousin Ben

I always said through this whole terrible cancer journey that this kind of experience brings out the best and the worst in people. Sometimes it is the worst, but usually it has been the best as we have tried to hold on to hope, give grace, and love one another. It is has been true in our children as well.

Yesterday, we attended the memorial service for cousin Ben. It was beautiful. As I talked to my cousin Kristen, I said I sometimes hesitated from sharing stories about Ben, because most of the time we spent with him was at the hospital when things were the most difficult for everyone. But we both agreed that many of those times brought out the best in him too. I remember going to visit, and seeing all his cars lined up perfectly. He asked Jordan if he wanted to play, and said nothing as Jordan messed up his perfect display, proceeding to dump the precious cars on the floor. I remember several times, him coming into our room and saying right away with no prompt from his parents and despite how terrible he was feeling..."how's Jordan doing, Becky?" Even at 2, he was thinking of the feelings of others.

The Bible says, "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." Romans 8:18. That is hard to believe considering the things we have experienced the last couple years. But, as we say good bye to sweet little Ben, we can't wait to see him again in glory.

Clear Scans

Clear scans today! Thanks for your prayers.

Update

Today, Becky took Jordan in for a scheduled appt. concerning his kidney function and the understanding was that things were holding up. We are going to continue to monitor his kidney, but at this point no surgery or significant procedure will need to be done. Tomorrow, Jordan (Friday) has his scan check and we are grateful for the continued prayers. Merry Christmas and enjoy the snow!

Only Sadness

I have tried to come up with something to write for the last couple weeks, but am without words, only sadness. As many of you know, Ben's cancer has returned and it has been very aggressive and is now incurable. Jordan's friend Jenna and her family also received news that her cancer has returned. They are without treatment options, as well. We are heartsick and devastated for them both. These days seem so clouded with pain and fear. Please pray for some peace for these families. It is beyond difficult as they are called to make the best of their time with their children, yet suffering so deeply.

I say NO! to all this stuff...

So much for staying out the hospital. Jordan had a kidney infection this past week and ended up being admitted for 2 days, then came home only to get sick again. He is doing fine now, but the week has knocked us down again. He goes in for some more testing this week to make sure his right kidney/ureter is working ok. We are very much wanting to avoid another surgery. Jordan's comment to being in the ER again was, "I say no to all this stuff!" I keep saying no to all this stuff too, but it seems to go on an on.

Home

Jordan made leaps and bounds the last day and checked off the long list of things the doctor listed for him to go home. So they gave us approval to leave last night. He is doing really well now. We have some tubes and extra things to deal with for the next week or so, and then hopefully life will return to normal